how did my mom do it?

well it finally happened. my first experience being a mom and being sick. earlier in the week i encountered my little man being sick for the first time and that was rough but at least i was healthy! today i sit in my pajamas as my baby boy sleeps, wishing i could actually fall asleep and rest but for some reason i can't. go figure...so i sit here wondering how did my mom do it?

my mom had four children and i never can really recall her being sick and not being able to function. she always found a way to do what she needed to do for us and was able to exhibit grace even when under the weather.

the other memory that came to my mind was what it was like to be a sick little girl and having my mom care for me. i must say my mom was the best at care-taking. being sick at home usually meant some time spent on the couch in the family room. mom would make me a menu for my meals and i would check mark the items that sounded good to eat. of course since i was sick, usually the menu consisted of a scrambled egg and toast. if i didn't feel too sick, sometimes i even got butter on the toast! but this was such a special way for my mom to care for me when i was feeling poorly. not like i ever tried to fake being sick *wink wink* but those times spent at home have been treasured in my heart. i hope i can be the same kind of caring, devoted, gracious, loving, self-sacrificing mom as my wonderful mother was to me.

uh oh, little man is awake. time for this mother to muster all the strength she can get despite the illness plaguing her body.

happy mother's day! thank you, mom!

wave bye-bye to insecurity, my friends!

i just wrapped up reading beth moore's newest book, "so long, insecurity you've been a bad friend to us". what a great book!

i had never read anything by beth moore before but i read an excerpt in a magazine several months ago that her book was about to be released. since the topic hit a chord with me, i just knew i needed to get this book.

i've always struggled with insecurity...do i look ok? what about my weight? will i ever get married? does he really love me? does this new outfit make me look thinner? will i ever be secure? each of us struggles with finding our true security. and i learned that our insecurities stem from our fears.

beth moore took an honest look at her own life and delves into a touchy subject for some. for me, it's a subject i have always needed to conquer and after reading this book, i'm at least on the right track.

the truth is we will never find security in things we own, or have...we will never find security in our friends, family or our mate...we will never find security in our jobs or the amount of money we have or don't have. the only way for us to be secure is through Jesus Christ!

Jesus has promised to never leave us or forsake us...people on this earth come and go, marriages fail, friends de-friend but Jesus will never fail us. Jesus has promised to provide our every need...we may lose our job, fall on tough economic times and wonder how the bills will be paid, but Jesus provides.

we may think, "oh if i just had more money things would be better" or "if i was married i would be happier" or "if i lost 10 pounds i would feel more confident". all of those things are based on feelings and our feelings change through the circumstances we are in; however, we can have a constant...we can have security regardless or the circumstance through Christ. of course it might make things better if you had more money, but that doesn't bring security. it might make you feel better for a time if you lost 10 pounds, but the insecurity would rear it's ugly head in another area. we need to stop placing our trust/security in the things of this earth and the things that we "think" will bring security/happiness.

this book had so much to say that i'm going to take a couple of days to share some of the gems i found inside it. this post is just my heartfelt reaction after finishing the book. i hope you come back to read some of beth's thoughts from her personal journey.

selah

funnies

to quote uncle albert from mary poppins, "I love to laugh,(ha ha ha ha) loud and long and clear...the more I laugh, (ha ha ha ha) the more I fill with glee, and the more the glee, (hee hee hee hee) the more I'm a merrier me!"

sometimes it's good to take a break and laugh. these past few days i've been watching a lot of funny clips from youtube. here are a few i found funny. some are separate postings but make sure to check them out!


for some reason i can't get the links to work, so check out these websites when you can.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaruNs_7okY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bvVz-YtEpr8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yb6EbzT_leI

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pOMqqI-kzHY

the power of prayer to change your marriage

so i've been reading a lot. i mean, a lot! i've never been a huge reader but lately i've had the time and the drive to read. a book i just finished was called "the power of prayer to change your marriage" by stormie omartian. i had heard of her "power of a praying..." series but never read any of them. this book just jumped out to me.

it was an excellent book and i think i have over half of it underlined! each chapter covered an different area that marriages can face. the topics included:

Communication
Anger, Rudeness, Abuse
Forgiveness
Depression/Negative Emotions
Children
Finances
Additions/Destructive Behaviors
Outside Influences
Hardness of Heart
Priorities
Divorce
Infidelity
Leaving Home
Needing a Miracle

each chapter was filled with incredible truth and jam packed with scripture to back up those truths. regardless of your marital status, it is a powerful book that can change your relationship...and the Lord knows, we all need to change!

here are some of the nuggets of wisdom i gleaned.

-it is not only about praying through struggles to find healing, restoration, and change. it is also about praying to prevent these struggles from ever developing into anything serious in the first place.

-getting married is just the very beginning of your relationship. being married frees you to feel secure enough to let your true self show-for better or for worse-so you can see where you need God's healing and transformation. staying married depends on you both being able to communicate with one another.

-forgiveness doesn't make the other person right; it makes you free.

-God has given you a way out of them (situations) through the power of prayer, praise, His Word, His presence, and His love. bask in all that until you are free. and don't lose hope. be confident of this, that "He who began a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ." (Phil 1:6) God won't give up on you, so don't give up on yourself or your spouse.

-any secret life of lust grieves the Holy Spirit. it makes a mockery out of a Savior who laid down His life so that we can escape sin and its consequences. it's as if He set you free in vain because you don't want what He died to give you. it offends God when His children choose to open up to that which separates them from Him.

-when you keep your marriage vows, God stands behind your marriage. that's why your prayers for the preservation and strengthening of your relationship have such power. they are already God's will before you even speak them. praying puts God's will into action. it means God's power will stand against any enemy you face-whether the enemy comes from the outside or it is actually one or both of you.

-because God is a God of miracles, He can bring back what has been lost or resurrect what has died. the greatest thing you can do while waiting for your miracle is to let the joy of the Lord rise in your heart.

WOW! some powerful statements there. it's a challenging book! definitely a read for those who are looking for God's best in their relationship.

selah

powerful

it's no surprise how much i love music. it is my way to express myself emotionally, physically and spiritually. these songs are so significant to me at this very moment. i hope they bring encouragement to those who hear.

"God is in the hard stuff"

This is the title of a book I've been perusing the last couple of days. It was written by Bruce Bickel and Stan Jantz. It's been good to be reminded of several truths when we face difficulty in life. One of the sections in the book was on marriage. Here are several things that I couldn't get out of my head.

"When a marriage begins to disintegrate, there is friction between the spouses. That dislocation of the relationship is always difficult to endure, but both individuals know that it will happen. The often unexpected and unarticulated pain of marriage difficulties comes from a sense of disillusionment. At some point, each spouse will come to the shocking realization that their romantic dreams of matrimonial bliss are totally unrealistic. The wife is dejected because she had envisioned a continued courtship with lasting, loving attention from the man she married; this is now just a dashed dream. The husband is disconsolate because he has not received the love and respect he had assumed would always be forthcoming from his bride; the stark reality of it all hurts."

Wow. It's good for me to be reminded that I often romanticize my marriage and how that is just a disillusion. As a little girl, I grew up reading fairy tale stories and wishing that one day, I too would live happily ever after. It never will be like those romantic stories. Because we are sinners, and we marry sinners, we will never have a perfect relationship. If we love God first we are able to love our spouse like God would.

"Whether a marriage is irrevocably broken or still hanging together by a thread, it is important to realize that a person's needs will never be completely fulfilled by a spouse. That is an unreasonable-and impossible-expectation. While a loving spouse can be supportive in many ways, only God can provide you with a sense of worth and wholeness. Don't expect a spouse to provide what is available only from God."

For me, that is a reminder I need to hear. My first and foremost love should be to God. My husband comes second and my child third. It's difficult to keep that in balance.

Here are some good summary points from the end of the chapter:

-"God should be the love of your life."

-"A good marriage won't happen unless you get a divorce from yourself.
You can't love God or your spouse if you love yourself more."

-"Don't be desperate to get married. Be desperate for God."

Some good reminders about marriage whether you are married or not.

my how time has flown...

It's been since March since I've blogged and it seems like it has been an eternity! So much has happened. We welcomed our beautiful boy, Benjamin James into the world in July and he has been such a joy in our lives! With the new baby arriving, life has gotten hectic and thus, no blogging. However, today is December 31st and I am determined to start blogging again, BEFORE the new year! So it's not technically a resolution because I started the day before. :)

Today is the last day of 2009. I think back on all I've endured in the last year and it has been full of emotions. Sadness, unbelief, joy, exhaustion, delight, and more. This has been an incredible and hard year in many ways and I'm thankful for every moment, for it has made me the person I am. It has been a convicting year, one in which I've seen things I must change. So I look toward the future with hope. 2010 is going to be the best year yet whether it brings heartache, surprise, wonders & miracles for it will be another opportunity for me to become the wife, mother, daughter, sister, aunt, cousin, friend, woman, I am supposed to be.