being the hands and feet of Jesus

compassion: sympathetic consciousness of others' distress together with a desire to alleviate it (emphasis mine)



i thought this was a great devotional this morning and wanted to share it. this comes from Joni Eareckson Tada's book Diamonds in the Dust.

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort." 2 Corinthians 1:3

What word best describes the way you feel when you watch a dear friend in agony? What is the word you wrap around your feelings when you see pictures on television of starving refugees in Africa, or earthquake victims in Armenia? It probably is the word "compassion."

We use that word frequently yet hardly give its true meaning much thought. I looked up compassion in the dictionary and discovered that the first part of the word means "with", and the second part means "that which relates to the agony and suffering of Christ on the cross." Amazing what you find in some dictionaries!

When you feel compassion, you experience what Christ feels. And when you say you have compassion for someone, you are standing with that person, agonizing with him, and suffering as though you were in his shoes. Just as Christ placed himself on the cross on our behalf, we are demonstrating compassion when we take on the cross that someone else is bearing.

God doesn't want you to merely feel deeply about a person in heartbreaking circumstances. Aren't you glad that Jesus did more than just "feel bad" about your sin? He went much further than pitying our sad situation. He put himself in our place, and His love has given new meaning to the word "compassion." "Let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth" (1 John 3:18).

Father of compassion, please use me today to reach out to someone in need. Help me not to just feel hurt and pain for their situation, but use me to help lighten their load. Jesus carried my cross so please grant me Your compassion so I may carry the cross of another who needs Your hope and encouragement.

that really challenged me today as i thought of those hurting around me. is it simply enough to pray for that person? prayer is definitely needed and is an act of compassion but i believe we are called to be the hands and feet of Jesus to those who are hurting...using our gifts and our resources to meet the very basic and practical needs of those who need it the most. phrases like standing with, agonizing with and suffering as if you were walking in their shoes...causes me to redefine my original thought of compassion and brings me to the point of genuine compassion.

wrapping it up

i've been taking the opportunity in my blog to review the notes i gathered from the familylife weekend to remember. it has been important for me to take a second look at what i learned and actually put it in writing so i have a better handle it. i also had such a burden to share what i learned with other women because it was so beneficial to me. i knew that others would benefit from it as well. so today i'm going to wrap up the last two topics. "how marriages thrive" and "leaving a legacy".

i think almost everyone who is married desires to have a marriage that thrives. barnett brickner stated, "Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate but through being the right mate." i think he got that one right! in the end we are responsible only for our actions, behaviors, words...we are not responsible for what our mate does or does not do.

essential #1 extravagant love: it is exclusive (one person has your heart for a lifetime), it is expressed (it is repeated often through words and actions), it is extraordinary (it places your spouse's needs above your own)
extravagant love is a choice not a feeling.

essential #2 generous forgiveness: it is offered quickly, applied freely, and expressed graciously

essential #3 enthusiastic encouragement: openly affirms your spouse, avoids critical words, maintains a positive attitude, even in hard times

after we were challenged to have a thriving marriage we were asked the question, "what kind of legacy will you leave?"

i think all of us want to leave a positive legacy that is passed down from generation to generation. but how do we accomplish that? it seems like a daunting task.

hebrews 13:16 says, "do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God."

we are to be examples in our every day life...doing good and sharing...making sacrifices.

we need to preach a silent sermon...our actions speak louder than words.

we need to rejoice in our progress rather in perfection.

we need to put on the full armour of God as a family.

what is a priority for your family?

this video was played at the end of the session and it spoke volumes to my heart. i hope it challenges you to think about who you want to be. what you want your family to be? what kind of legacy will you leave?

this one's for the girls

one of the most meaningful times at the familylife weekend to remember was when it was just the women. it was great to be with my husband and hearing what God has for us as a couple and for our marriage but at just the right moment, girl time was needed. i'm going to share with you what was shared with that group of ladies...embracing God's wonderful design in our lives.

1. How do you become the wife and/or mother God has designed you to be?

A. Ordering your life according to God's priorities: growing in a relationship with God first,respecting and supporting husband second, teaching and training children third.

B. Ordering everything else in life: job, volunteer work, activities

2. A discerning woman chooses God's design rather than other influences

A. She intentionally pursues a relationship with God: praying and reading Bible, actively involved at church, spending time with other women who share her faith in God.

B. She welcomes God's design for marriage: man to be leader, woman to be man's helper and completer, having equal value but different roles in marriage

C. She actively works at being the best wife she can be: marriage most important human relationship, marriage takes priority over relationship with children, other family members and friends

D. She gives significant attention to her responsibility and call as a mother

3. A strong woman demonstrates love for her husband by respecting and supporting him

A. Men have a longing for his wife's respect and support

B. Respect is a choice to receive your husband in spite of his weaknesses

C. Communicating respect involves your attitude, your words, and your actions

D. Support is a choice to follow your husband's leadership

4. An effective mother lovingly teaches and trains her children

A. She looks carefully at the wisdom for parents that God provides in the Bible

B. She lovingly and intentionally guides and instructs the next generation: introduces them to God, communicates family's values, models godly womanhood, provides regular instruction, does not allow the home to become child-centered

C. She specifically guides children in identity, character, relationships, and purpose

D. She helps to shape the future by equipping and influencing the next generation

5. A wise woman depends on God

A. Marriage and parenting is hard work

B. Remember your priorities

C. The Holy Spirit will empower you

D. Trust God's design. Follow His plan. Leave the results to Him.

it's often easier to read this than to apply it. i know after sitting in the women's session i felt very overwhelmed...thinking i'm not where i should be as a wife and mother...the weight of the world on my shoulders to raise a godly child...etc. i know i'm not the only one with those thoughts, but it's always reassuring to know that i have help from my Father in heaven. His Spirit is with me always and enables me to do what needs to be done according to His will and that's what i pray for every day. life as a wife and mother can be very tough but we have a refuge, we have a source of power on our side to help us be all that God wants us to be. praise the Lord for that! that gives us hope, ladies!

who doesn't fight?

Don't duke it out,
Don't fake it out,
Don't hide it out,
Work it out!

that's a good start to a good topic...conflict. we all need pointers on how to resolve conflict. at the FamilyLife Weekend to Remember this was on of the topics discussed. i found it to be very helpful information and i hope you do too.

where does conflict come from? conflict occurs when our desires are not fulfilled...our expectations have not been meet...we have been hurt. our unfulfilled desires can result in anger. thus comes the conflict.

how do we resolve our conflict? here are a few suggestions.

A. Before you confront, examine the offense

1. Determine if the offense requires confrontation
2. Consider your contribution to the conflict
3. Examine your heart

B. Lovingly confront

1. Speak the truth in love
2. Approach confrontation carefully
3. Choose your words carefully
4. Your goal is to restore oneness in your marriage

resolving conflict requires forgiveness.

true forgiveness is not:
- pretending that something did not happen
- conditional
- forgetting
- an automatic cure for the hurt

granting forgiveness is:
- a choice to set your spouse free from the debt of their offense
- an attitude of letting go of resentment and vengeance
- the first step toward rebuilding trust
- an act of obedience to God

in the end we should be blessing our spouse not insulting them. we have the choice in how we respond.

bless your spouse by cultivating a new attitude.
choose a blessing instead of insult.
blessing your spouse follows the example of Jesus.
seek to be a peacemaker not a troublemaker.