powerful

it's no surprise how much i love music. it is my way to express myself emotionally, physically and spiritually. these songs are so significant to me at this very moment. i hope they bring encouragement to those who hear.

"God is in the hard stuff"

This is the title of a book I've been perusing the last couple of days. It was written by Bruce Bickel and Stan Jantz. It's been good to be reminded of several truths when we face difficulty in life. One of the sections in the book was on marriage. Here are several things that I couldn't get out of my head.

"When a marriage begins to disintegrate, there is friction between the spouses. That dislocation of the relationship is always difficult to endure, but both individuals know that it will happen. The often unexpected and unarticulated pain of marriage difficulties comes from a sense of disillusionment. At some point, each spouse will come to the shocking realization that their romantic dreams of matrimonial bliss are totally unrealistic. The wife is dejected because she had envisioned a continued courtship with lasting, loving attention from the man she married; this is now just a dashed dream. The husband is disconsolate because he has not received the love and respect he had assumed would always be forthcoming from his bride; the stark reality of it all hurts."

Wow. It's good for me to be reminded that I often romanticize my marriage and how that is just a disillusion. As a little girl, I grew up reading fairy tale stories and wishing that one day, I too would live happily ever after. It never will be like those romantic stories. Because we are sinners, and we marry sinners, we will never have a perfect relationship. If we love God first we are able to love our spouse like God would.

"Whether a marriage is irrevocably broken or still hanging together by a thread, it is important to realize that a person's needs will never be completely fulfilled by a spouse. That is an unreasonable-and impossible-expectation. While a loving spouse can be supportive in many ways, only God can provide you with a sense of worth and wholeness. Don't expect a spouse to provide what is available only from God."

For me, that is a reminder I need to hear. My first and foremost love should be to God. My husband comes second and my child third. It's difficult to keep that in balance.

Here are some good summary points from the end of the chapter:

-"God should be the love of your life."

-"A good marriage won't happen unless you get a divorce from yourself.
You can't love God or your spouse if you love yourself more."

-"Don't be desperate to get married. Be desperate for God."

Some good reminders about marriage whether you are married or not.

my how time has flown...

It's been since March since I've blogged and it seems like it has been an eternity! So much has happened. We welcomed our beautiful boy, Benjamin James into the world in July and he has been such a joy in our lives! With the new baby arriving, life has gotten hectic and thus, no blogging. However, today is December 31st and I am determined to start blogging again, BEFORE the new year! So it's not technically a resolution because I started the day before. :)

Today is the last day of 2009. I think back on all I've endured in the last year and it has been full of emotions. Sadness, unbelief, joy, exhaustion, delight, and more. This has been an incredible and hard year in many ways and I'm thankful for every moment, for it has made me the person I am. It has been a convicting year, one in which I've seen things I must change. So I look toward the future with hope. 2010 is going to be the best year yet whether it brings heartache, surprise, wonders & miracles for it will be another opportunity for me to become the wife, mother, daughter, sister, aunt, cousin, friend, woman, I am supposed to be.

Broken & Beautiful

As I was flying to Ohio, I was listening to my ipod. I usually let it shuffle but this time I was listening to Mark Schultz. He has a song called "Broken & Beautiful". I just love the imagery in this song. Once again, it is a song that stirs deep emotions within me. It's overwhelming to think of how I am so undeserving of God's love because I am a sinner. Knowing that I sin, I continually sin, but with God's grace, I am not broken but I am beautiful to Him. This song has such a positive message of redemption. No matter what we have done in our past or present or future, we can come to Christ just as we are...

I hope this song ministers to your heart as it does mine.

slow fade

i posted this song back in october but wanted to post it again. this song really touches a chord in me. this morning as i was listening to it, i was struck by tears. the powerful words of this song ring so true. as i think of bringing a child into this world, it hits me even harder. my husband and i are to be an example.

in today's world, affairs and divorce are common place. it truly takes God at the center of a marriage to make it work. i remember a friend i used to work with. she was older and she eventually went though a divorce. her and her husband were a godly couple who were very active in their church and ministry. you wonder how do people who are walking with the Lord get to that place? i remember her telling me it was a slow progress over a period of time. it started with missing a few sunday's here and there. then missing devotional time...it was a "slow fade". he was then at the point of giving himself away because he was no longer focused on Christ individually or as a couple. through God's amazing grace we can be picked up by His outstretched arm and be brought back to His side, but we still face the consequence. this song for me, more or less, is a warning...an encouragement to "be aware". don't let yourself slide. don't allow the black and white to turn to gray. be a lover of Christ. have Christ as the center of each and every relationship. be aware of those who look up to you as an example. whether it be brothers, sisters, friends, children, etc. be an example of Christ and of His relationship with His bride.

many of us remember the song "oh be careful little eyes what you see"..."slow fade" ties that song in beautifully in order to convey the message in such a poignant way. i hope it speaks to your heart like it does mine.

east to west

this song by casting crowns is one of my favorites. it really is such a picture of how God forgives and how we as humans struggle to understand just how far those sins have been removed and will be forgotten.

psalm 103:12

"as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us." (NIV)

"and as far as sunrise is from sunset,he has separated us from our sins." (MSG)

Be Mine

I got this in an email for Valentine's Day and I wanted to share the message. I hope you had a wonderful day full of love!

By: Rachel Olsen

"My lover is mine, and I am his." Song of Solomon 2:16 (NLT)

While I spent the last few months thinking about Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's, another group of people likely spent it focused on Valentine's Day: greeting card writers. Valentine's Day is the second-biggest card-buying holiday besides Christmas. More than 200 million cards will be exchanged this weekend. That's a lot of love.

Have you ever watched somebody pick out a greeting card for someone special? Growing up, my family owned a chain of Hallmark stores where I worked as a sales clerk. The occasional customer would breeze in, look at two or three cards and then head to my cash register. However, most would spend 10, 20, even 30 minutes reading through cards, searching for the just right expression of love.

In Christ, God sent us the ultimate Valentine. "This is how much God loved the world: He gave his Son, his one and only Son. And this is why: so that no one need be destroyed; by believing in him, anyone can have a whole and lasting life" (John 3:16, The Message). Whole and lasting, two things we desperately seek but rarely find in this world. Long after the greeting cards I might receive are forgotten, I know that God's love for me endures.

Jesus demonstrated His love for us and taught us how to live and love each other. He received criticism, testing and rejection -- and yet gathered strength from God to turn the other cheek. Jesus prayed for us, and His enemies. He even suffered crucifixion in order to save us from our sin. Jesus is God's perfect expression of love. His life and death are God saying to me and you, "Be Mine."

Yes, God loves us so much that He gave us His most valuable gift, Himself. And after Jesus rose fr om the grave and ascended back to heaven, God sent His Spirit to remain with us. As He shares Himself with us through His Son and His Sprit, God says, "You are my beloved." Hearing that is better than any sentiment the best card-writer could pen. God Himself, given for you and me -- as well as anyone willing to open their heart to Him -- demonstrates the ultimate expression of love. Like melt-in-your-mouth chocolates from a heart-shape satin box, He invites us to taste and see that He is good.

Close your eyes and hear Him whispering to you today, "Be Mine."